To Tell Or Not To Tell

That is the question.

So far, I've only told my 2 best friends. We had originally planned to tell our immediate families this weekend. If everything looks good on the U/S, that is. Then we were going to wait at least another few weeks or maybe into the second trimester before making the big announcement to everyone else.

This weekend is my Mom's birthday as well as Father's Day. I'm pretty sure we're still gonna tell my Mom and Stepdad during some sort of get together on Saturday. I'm planning on getting my Mom a 'Happy Birthday Grandma' card, since this will be her first grandchild. And I might put an U/S pic inside too just in case she doesn't get it. Which she might not. I love her, but she never gets jokes. We wanted to tell them to keep it to themselves for a few more weeks. However, my Aunt and Uncle are coming in to visit on Monday and my Aunt is pretty much my Mom's best friend and Mom likes to brag to her brother, my uncle, about things. They'll be spending the whole week with them and we'll be having dinner with all of them a few times during the week. There's just no way she won't tell them. But that's ok. I can handle that. I was more worried about fringe people like co-workers and distant family knowing. They're the ones that don't end up getting told when something goes wrong. And it's torture when you run into them and have to tell them yourself, months later.

Here's the big conundrum. We always have a get together with Rich's family on Father's Day. Usually at one of our houses and it's us, Rich's parents, siblings, and spouses. So we were going to break the news then. Problem is instead of getting together with just the immediate family they want us to join them at church for a Father's Day BBQ. My FIL works at the church and has to be there for this event. They'll be at church before that and the BBQ lasts until 7 pm. So there's no way my BIL and SIL will want to do anything afterward with their 2 little kids. They'll head home. So either we tell them at the BBQ and everyone in their church will know, or we wait until afterwards and only tell his parents and not the siblings.

I'm irritated by the whole thing because I wanted to be able to share it when we were all together and able to talk about it freely. I wanted the big celebration. Damn it, we've been through so much. We deserve that. It's finally our turn, I want everyone to be excited and hugging and yelling and talking about it all day. But that can't happen if we're trying to tell them on the down low during the church thing or right before or after. And we probably won't all be together again any time soon. So maybe we just tell them and let everyone else know. That way THEY could brag to all of their friends and the extended family that may or may not be there as well. That certainly would make for a big celebration. But then there ya go with all those fringe people. Fortunately they're not really people that I run into on a regular basis. So maybe it's ok. AAHHH!!! I can't decide what to do! Any opinions?